Making generalizations about generations is always going to require painting with some broad brushstrokes –– but I have noticed some trends about managers lately that seem to be holding true across many of the businesses I work with. It’s been especially interesting to see how these trends are impacting (and in some cases forming!) the shifts in the world of work we’re experiencing now.

Here’s what I’m seeing:

Boomers

The good: Managers in this age cohort have a wealth of lived experience, and you just can’t get the same depth and breadth of know-how with any other cohort. They’ve been through multiple recessions, they’ve seen the ups and downs of business, and they can often see things others can’t because they’ve worked through similar situations before.

The bad: While this is certainly not universal, I’ve seen that a number of boomer managers have a hard time relating to their workforce. (This is certainly not a one-way street, I also see that younger cohorts have a hard time relating to their older managers as well.) They have a tendency to be so far up that they forget what it’s like to be down in the weeds, and they can neglect communicating with their workforce, since they forget that not everybody has the same lived experience they do, and may need things spelled out in different ways.

My tip for boomer managers: Lead with empathy. This is good advice for any manager, but I especially recommend it to my managers in this age cohort, because empathy unlocks the key to that relationship with your workforce. While you have lots of experience, the people you work with do too, even if it’s not as deep or broad as yours.

Gen X-ers

The good: Gen X-ers are the sandwich generation, squeezed in between the two larger cohorts of the boomers and the millennials, which means that they have good insight into those around them. They tend to see the strengths and weaknesses of both cohorts, and are able to easily navigate whatever team they happen to be working with. 

The bad: Again, this is far from a universal, but some Gen-X-ers seem to have one foot out the door. We’re all aging, and it can be tempting to stop learning, or to try and ride out those last couple of years. This can also lead them to favor stability over change, which means that they can unintentionally hamper good ideas by naysaying them before really considering whether that’s in the best interests of the team.

My tip for Gen-X managers: Be present, and curious. My favorite quote from Ted Lasso (which actually originated with Walt Whitman) is “Stay curious, not judgmental.” Lean into that strength you have of fitting in with different age cohorts, and be willing to give new ideas a try, even if they seem like they might be impractical on first viewing.

Millennials

The good: Millennials have the widest-spread growth mindset of any of the cohorts I’ve seen. I’ve had many come through my Manager Training Series and they have this burning curiosity and desire to grow that aligns well with where they’re at in their career trajectory. They’ve got a lot of momentum, and they bring that to their workforces as well.

The bad: Yet again, this isn’t true of every millennial manager I see, but I do see that some of them can have a tendency to get into responsibility silos. As in “this and only this is my responsibility, and I will not engage with things beyond my direct responsibility.” While it’s great to know your boundaries, teams and workplaces aren’t perfectly clear-cut in terms of responsibilities, and sometimes you need someone to step up and take responsibility if it’s presented.

My tip for millennial managers: Watch out for a tendency to hyper-individuate. Absolutely respect yourself, and respect your boundaries, and also recognize that the nature of reality in which you are working is that you are part of a team. Marry that momentum you so naturally bring to things with the ability to lead and work as part of a team, and you’ll see so much change.

What does this mean for the world of work overall?

I think the main thing we can all take away from this is that the world of work is becoming more complex, and not just in the way that people talk about when they write about the VUCA world of work. 

We’re now working with an unprecedented mix of generations in the workplace (I didn’t even get to Gen Z, they’re just starting out in their manager journey!) and that means that the core things that always make for good management are more important than ever: curiosity. Good listening. Teamwork. Kindness. And empathy.

The more you’re able to lead with those things in your management, the smaller the generational divides become, and the more you’re able to pull on everybody’s strengths.

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A practical guide to more empathetic management

McGeachy Consulting, LLC

Have you noticed that people are a bit more ... edgy in the workplace these days? From your direct report being moved to tears by well-meaning constructive feedback or that one person everyone tip toes around because they never know what might set them off, the world of work has definitely changed.

Organizational Development leaders have been talking about empathy and connection as qualities of inspiring leaders for some time but now, in this post-COVID era, when people are returning to the office, working hybrid, feeling overwhelmed, possibly even burnt out, pulled in many directions, empathy and connection seem vital to positive relationships at work.

But does it really make a difference? And how do you make it happen?

Short answer: yes, and practice.

The Center for Creative Leadership has found that “Empathy in the Workplace is positively related to job performance.” That's relevant to everyone, managers and individual contributors. Also they noted that managers experience two boosts to their performance by practicing empathy. First, they were viewed as a better supervisor to their direct reports. And, "Managers who practiced empathetic leadership toward direct reports were viewed as better performers by their bosses."

How to be empathetic in the workplace:

A lot of it comes down to how you interact in conversation with the people around you. Something as simple as using empathetic statements can really make a difference. For instance, when someone...

• shares bad news with you

• expresses a complaint (even if it's about you!)

• discloses their feelings or fears

...consider saying something like,

• I’m so sorry, I don't even know what to say right now, but I'm glad you shared this with me

• It makes sense that you feel ___________.

• It sounds like you've done everything you could

• I'm sorry you're experiencing this right now

• I understand how you feel

Empathy vs. sympathy

It’s also important to note that we’re talking about empathetic here, not sympathetic.

Empathy is digging into your painful past, pulling up your own feelings similar to what the person just shared with you, and responding. I know I'm in empathy with someone when I physically feel it in my chest. When someone shares that their family dog has passed, my body immediately pulls up those aching feelings, and I goes straight to empathy. “I'm so sorry to hear that. I don't even know what to say, but I'm glad you told me.” And then I usually say something like, “Let the ugly tears flow”, because I know from my own experience that it's healthier to let them out than hold them in. 

By noteworthy contrast, a sympathetic response would be something like; “At least it was only your dog and not a family member” (Ouch!”, or worse, “That will save you a bunch of money on dog food and vet appointments (double ouch)”. You know you have defaulted to using sympathy when the words at least are included in your response. 

Here are a couple of real-life examples to help you really integrate the difference:

Empathy in the Workplace, McGeachy Consulting, LLC

If you take away one thing from this blog, put a sticky note on your desk, reminding you not to use the words "at least" if you intend to be empathetic. And, watch yourself when you try and one-up someone’s situation when a dose of empathy would be beneficial instead.

I'm practicing using empathy to build better connections with people, I hope you will too. Our workplaces, and the world, need it.  

And, of course, if you’d like help in developing your managerial skills for this new world of work, I’m here to help. See how we can work together here.